Even though I questioned farming practises for a long time, I never considered leaving the industry as it was a tradition for my family, and I had gained a lot of very useful skills.
I pressed on with my career, but my heart was definitely not engaged in my daily life.
I lacked purpose and direction and felt bound by responsibility, obligation and family tradition. All of these factors weighed heavily on me, but I was paralysed to do anything about it.
When I was in my early thirties and still working on the dairy farm, I chanced upon a book by Edgar Cayce titled “Psychic Sense”.
This book made a significant impact on my life and was a catalyst for opening up my spiritual awareness, and an understanding of something greater than myself and my physical body.
I began reading in this book about the idea of witnessing and harnessing our innate spiritual energy.
I would drive out to the far reaches of the farm in the ute, park under a willow tree and practice working with my energy by holding my arms in a circle shape, fingers almost touching, while focusing with a soft gaze on my fingertips.
I remember the elation and excitement of seeing my energy held in my aura for the first time!
I would love to say that I carried on with these practices and became skilled at using my energy, but I didn’t.
I got caught up in the daily struggles and worries of life and it took me another four years to finally leave the farm to move into town and work in a local pub.
At age thirty-seven, after many years of agonising over whether to carry on the family farm in the footsteps of my mother, I knew I had to leave to follow my true hearts calling. It was a difficult decision as my brothers had no interest in the farm so if I quit, the tradition ended with me.